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Transland - Consent, Kink, and Pleasure


Consent, Kink, and Pleasure

By Mx. Sly
Categories: LGBTQ+, Trans Literature, Biography & Memoir, LGBTQ+ Literature
Paperback : 9781551529318, 264 pages, 2023



A memoir of transformation and self-discovery that explores fetish communities from a gender diverse perspective

Transland is a fiery and revealing memoir that delves into what happens when a non-binary person goes looking for self-worth and a sense of belonging in fetish subculture, only to find that fetish communities come with just as many problematic rules, expectations, and hierarchies as mainstream ones.

Moving from wide-eyed optimism that the fetish community is the promised land to realizing the ways fetish communities - even queer ones - reinforce the commodification of bodies, Mx. Sly examines how BDSM helped them understand and articulate their gender, how kink helped them turn shameful experiences into liberating ones, and how they became disillusioned with the BDSM scene - without rejecting the lessons fetish taught them.

The stories in this memoir explore PTSD, intergenerational trauma, memory, consent, gender transition and diversity, queer relationships and subculture, and a lot of bondage. From dating a charismatic Toronto femmedom to being bone bros with an Aussie rope bondage expert, Transland is an odyssey of kinky hookups and gender euphoria and a wandering quest through sensuality toward personal strength and self-reliance.

Sexy, gutting, graphic, and existential, Transland is about finding oneself through intense sensations, reaching a point where being hit has diminishing returns, and coming out wiser on the other side.


  • Short-listed, Lambda Literary Award 2024


Mx. Sly brings unapologetic sexuality, a keen sense of detail, and emotional rawness to their work. It's the type of storytelling that's prone to leave audiences equal parts nervous and turned on. -Graham Isador, former contributing editor with VICE

Powerfully raw and kinky in all the best ways. I was so emotionally invested. This memoir is fucking amazing. -Hasan Namir, author of God in Pink

Mx. Sly is a mesmerizing writer, and Transland is a mesmerizing book. Through prose as spine-chilling in its eloquence as in its honesty, Sly shows how the world of kink can satisfy needs that are universal: the need for perspective, for imagination, for transformation, for transcendence. By turns raunchy, heartbreaking, and wise, Transland is a resplendent act of affirmation. -C.E. Gatchalian, author of Double Melancholy: Art, Beauty, and the Making of a Brown Queer Man